Let go of past grief and enjoy the present

It’s difficult for parents when their child learns to walk, watching this little person pull themselves up while knowing there is a high probability that they will fall and get hurt.

We cannot always be there to catch them but we must allow them to develop their skills and grow regardless of a few bumps and bruises along the way.

I found it very difficult with our first child to let go and not be overly protective until I realised we learn from both good and not so good experiences throughout our lives.

At some time we will all face the letting-go test, quite likely on numerous occasions. Sometimes it will be letting go of possessions or a driving licence, maybe a home so that we can downsize to something more manageable.

It could be when we retire and have to let go of the security of having a job five days a week.  Some folk may have to let go of good health or wealth.

But regardless of who we are, or our circumstances, we have a time of letting go, and no one is immune from the pain of having to let go of a loved one. We are left to cope without them and we have to “let go” if we are going to have a fulfilled life.

Being willing to let go promotes the healing process of grief. It does not mean you must forget who or what you have lost, but it does help you cope with the loss.

I have spoken with many grieving people in the past 30 years and death has not always been the cause of their grief.

It can be a lost job, declining social status, health, children and grandchildren moving away, a lost pet, retirement, having to leave the farm.

Being willing to “let go” helps us to grow and mature and sets us free from self pity that can lead us to the darkness of depression.

It opens new doors to finding fulfilment as a volunteer or becoming creative or just being a better person to be around.

Letting go allows us to experience new satisfaction with our lives that, although changed, can still be rewarding. We have our memories but that is not where we live right now. We don’t stop living just because we suffer loss.
There is just one question we all must ask ourselves, “do I grasp the past or let it go?”

How each of us responds to this question will determine our future, our attitudes, our happiness, our emotional stress, our health and wellbeing – as well as how often people will want to come and visit you.